Laughing my ass off

So, I just went through a rough spot with my girlfriend recently. I found out she was dating someone in Kansas while she was with me. I broke it off with her for a day, but I retracted that position a day later because I care about her a little bit.

The way I found out was through the guy she was dating. He messaged me on Facebook. His name was Cody Decker. He was using a girl named Kayla Martin's fb.

So, I got a phone call today from my girlfriend, Lisl, and she informed me that Cody is actually Kayla Martin. Haha! Cody Decker is a baseball player for the San Diego Padres.

So, I was worried about absolutely nothing... Still, she did have the intent to cheat on me, which still upsets me a little. She seemed to feel like shit for it though, so maybe she's not without a conscience. Perhaps this can all be saved.

She got played like a fiddle for five months though, which I find pretty fucking funny.

Uhh...

So, I've decided to make one of these to give me something else to do in my spare time. I find that I don't write enough anymore, and I'm hoping that this can assuage this plight.

So, I'm not sure what to start with, but I'm just going to write some random stuff to begin.

So, I love zombies. I often find myself longing for an infection to spread that reanimates corpses and causes people to becomes flesh-hungry, mindless husks. I want this because it'd be like a never-ending source of stress-relievement. And not like those stupid "stress balls". Those suck. I hate them. I'd rather smash a blood-ravenous creature's skull in with a Louisville slugger.

I have a list of people that I'd want at my side during a zombie apocalypse... And it goes like this.

• Johnathan Thompson
• Daniel Alcaraz

Now, that's not because I love them more than any other prospective readers that were not included in the list... It's because they're more valuable than you in that situation. Johnathan has Army survival skills, as well as the fact that he's a god with a handgun, and he's a genius. Daniel because he offers the greatest companionship, and he's probably the best fighter I know.

The list is condensed to two because groups of two to four are the only way to go during a zombie apocalypse.

All I need is a bible, a gun, copious amounts of ammunition, and these three, and I'm ready for an apocalypse.

When Hell hath no room for the Dead... The Dead shall inherit the Earth.